This is how I would have reviewed "Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen," which I saw in preview Monday night:
Boom! Robots! Shia LaBeouf! Boom! Robots! Megan Fox! Boom! Robots! Isabel Lucas! Boom! Robots! Megan Fox! Boom! Robots! Megan Fox! Flatbush? (Was that a Flatbush sign next to the deli? I'm from Flatbush!) John Turturro! Boom! Robots! Megan Fox! Boom! Robots! Megan Fox! Boom! Robot! Desert! Boom! Robots! Shia LaBeouf and Megan Fox!
Not that there's anything wrong with that. It's a rip-roaring summer action movie, and teen-age boys will love the eye candy, I'm sure.
Other things I couldn't help but notice . . .
** Sam (LaBeouf) has Decepticons after him because of information downloaded directly into his brain. That's straight out of NBC's "Chuck," right down to the blinking eyes and twitches that LaBeouf goes through whenever the new brain waves kick in.
** Rainn Wilson's cameo as Professor Colan gives "Transformers 2" the obligatory summer movie appearance by a player from "The Office." (But it's Ed Helms who seems to be everywhere these days.)
** Glenn Morshower, the upright Secret Service Agent Aaron Pierce of TV's "24," portrays . . . General Morshower. According to movieblog.com, "He was the Colonel in command of the US military base that was attacked in the beginning of the first Transformers movie. [His] character died in that attack but that isn't stopping Michael Bay from bringing him back for Transformers 2 anyway. He'll just be playing another character." Glad director Bay saw fit to give Morshower a promotion, too. He's so solid on "24" without ever being boring.
** Former "Las Vegas" star Josh Duhamel (seen with co-star Shia LaBeouf at the movie's premiere/AP/Matt Sayles) also gets a promotion. He's the leader of NEST (Non-Biological Extraterrestrial Species Team), the military unit that supports the Autobots. Duhamel has leading-man looks but there's not much on his plate, according to IMDB.com. He's got a rom-com, "When in Rome" with Kristen Bell, listed as completed for next year, and that's it. Well, he is a newlywed - to Fergie of Black-Eyed Peas.
** Duhamel's NEST buddy, Tyrese Gibson, on the other hand, has been cast as Marvel Comics' Luke Cage in a film named for the title character.
** Peter Cullen returns as the voice of Optimus Prime, a role he originated in the TV cartoon version. One of the world's great voice artists, Frank Welker, is onboard as Soundwave and Devastator. He's also the voice of Scooby Doo and Abu the monkey in Disney's "Aladdin."
** Watch for Anthony Anderson, who was a computer wiz in the first movie and now stars on TV's "Law & Order," and you won't find him. But listen carefully: He provides the voice of Jolt.